hind•sight
(noun) understanding of a situation or event only after it has happened or developed.
“Hindsight is 20/20…”
Many of us have heard this sentiment before. It seems like an unlikely notion, doesn’t it? That we can see more clearly when looking back than when staring at what’s right in front of us. It seems backwards when you look at it in a physical sense.
In March, I attended SHE CAN | A Women Empowering Women event at the Milestone Christian Centre hosted by the Toronto Church of Christ*, and I was part of the panel of seven women that shared a conversation about what it means to become who we are. It was a very empowering and inspiring event!
One of the main things I spoke about was this idea of hindsight as part of our becoming who we are and who we can be. Let’s get real, there is a LOT that we go through in our lives, both individually and collectively. Many of us go through life with a set of expectations, and whether it’s near-sighted or far, we see a picture in our minds of what we are preparing ourselves for and where we expect our journey to be headed.
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord,
“plans to prosper you and not to harm you,
plans to give you hope and a future.”
—Jeremiah 29:11 NIV
But life doesn’t always go the way we think, does it? Life always changes, like the waves of the sea, it moves and ebbs, it crashes and bounds. God uses it to challenge us to adapt, to move us to have a different viewpoint, and force us to evolve (dare I say, improve). I believe this notion of hindsight gives us a different perspective when it comes to life changing and life derailing circumstances.
There have been times in my life when I thought I knew what my five-year, ten-year, rest-of-life outlook looked like. And there have been many times when I have felt sidelined by life and cheated from getting to my expectations. There have been times when I don’t get where God is going with this, when I don’t see what the solution is, when I don’t feel strong enough to carry the weight of this load, when I don’t see how any of this could possibly lead to a prosperous and hopeful future.
“Knowing where you are
by knowing where you’ve been”
—Maui, Moana
Looking back has given me a sense of the bigger picture. I can see now that the times in our lives when God derails our expectations and puts us on a different track are in order to steer us towards something amazing; perhaps a blessing we never even had on our sights before, a potential we wouldn’t have reached had it not been for conflict, a joy we wouldn’t have discovered had we not cried the tears. That being said, this is not an easy conclusion to reach. In fact, it may even be hard to accept this when we are going through those hard times. And “hard times” is a creature that can take a different shape for every one of us, and the battle to conquer them is part of the journey to becoming who we can be.
Looking back has also given me a different view of myself. Hindsight gives us a chance to see ourselves for who we are, it allows us to appreciate that our identity is not singular, it is multi-faceted. We are a tapestry, we are made of different parts: our culture, our history, our experiences, our opinions, our words, our actions, and even our mistakes, our failures, our wrong choices, and our shortcomings. Since I became a mom, I’ve had a deeper appreciation for how a person’s identity and personality are shaped as they go through life. It is amazing to watch children grow and develop their own personalities, dispositions, and opinions. It is also amazing to look back and see how my own personality, dispositions, and opinions were formed and what it took to get there.
“I love the person I’ve become,
because I fought to become her.”
—Kaci Diane
I love this quote I found a couple of years back. It is only a few simple words, but it speaks to me about self acceptance and self worth, about speaking out and speaking up, about shedding the shame and guilt, about facing the world and facing yourself. It’s about facing the truth that, whether you reached your expectations or not, the person you are is the one that got you through those difficult times, the person you are is the one who fought through those obstacles, the person you are is the person who didn’t back down to the challenge, the person you are is exactly who you needed her to be and she is not someone to be ashamed of.
Life may not always go as we planned, in fact we can count on it giving us a few roadblocks and tunnels every now and then. And the way out may not always be clear when we’re stuck wandering in the dark for awhile. Hindsight allows us to make the best of those times, it allows us to look to be better, to find a way to make it worth it and make it count.
At the SHE CAN women’s event I attended, the final portion of the day was capped off by a dance performance by one of our very talented teen members. She performed to the song “This Is Me” by Keala Settle from the movie musical The Greatest Showman. Now, at the time, I had not yet seen the movie or heard this song, but I was both floored and lifted up by it at the same time! This song to me feels like taking yourself in its truest and fiercest form, putting it on a stage and letting it roar for the world to see and hear. It brought tears to my eyes, because it was a message of affirmation to myself:
“I am brave, I am bruised, I am who I’m meant to be. This is ME!”
— JoyisMom
*For more information on the SHE CAN event and the Toronto Church of Christ, check out this blog post: http://torontocc.com/she-can-womens-day-2019/
***”Become” panel photo taken by Shannon Robbins Photography, borrowed from the blog post above
***There was a bunch of material that has been giving me lots of inspiration and positivity lately… stay tuned for a “Hindsight Part 2” for more details
JoyisLife 